I thought the analogy to losing a child was pretty powerful.
Accepting That Grief Can Last A Lifetime
Often I fear that too many of us - both in the adoption community and in society at large - see grieving as it relates to an adoptee's loss as a one-time occurrence. In fact I know some who view their children's grieving as an isolated incident that begins upon their child's arrival into their families and whose pattern of grief is somehow expected to adhere to time-inflicted parameters. So many times I read and hear about grieving portrayed as an "event" or prolonged series of episodes that is thought to have an end date, as if there is a finite conclusion that caps off the compulsory nights of crying, or days of our children refusing to establish solid eye contact or weeks where our child may seem reserved, upset or unusually withdrawn.