Talking to kids about race and racism

There are many great articles about the importance of talking to children about race and racism. Posting some links here, primarily aimed at White parents:

Are We Raising Racists? "White children are exposed to racism daily. If we parents don’t point it out, show how it works and teach why it is false, over time our children are more likely to accept racist messages at face value. When they see racial inequality — when the only doctors or teachers they see are white, or fewer kids in accelerated classes are black, for example — they won’t blame racism. Instead, they’ll blame people of color for somehow falling short."

Color-Blindness as Intellectual ChildAbuse: Raising Anti-Racist Kids in an Unequal Society “You know the explanation… Anyone can make it if they try.’ Problem being, when we teach kids this — the cornerstone of our secular gospel — and then they look around, noticing in the process that some have not made it to the extent others have, what do they then conclude? And can we be surprised when that conclusion might be one that serves to rationalize racial and economic inequities? To make them natural, normal, the result of some groups merely being better and others worse, some smarter and others less so, some harder working and others lazy?"

Your 5-year-old is already racially biased. Here’s what you can do about it. "The crucial question isn’t 'Why bring issues of racial, ethnic, religious and other kinds of bias into our schools?' It’s 'how do we constructively engage the harmful biases we know pervade our schools and just about everywhere else? And what can we do to shape our children’s racial attitudes before and as they emerge?'"

What White Children Need to Know About Race “Because white students receive color-blind messages, they come to believe that merely talking about race is racist and, therefore, something that should be avoided. Students need to learn that there’s a vast difference between talking about race and being racist. Racial talk leads to greater racial understanding and helps undermine the power of racist laws, structures, and traditions.”

Moments in the life of a rule-following child

Me: Will you stop at the produce store and get me a lemon on your way home from school?
Him: We're not supposed to go into stores on our way home.
Me: The school doesn't want a bunch of kids going into the convenience store right after school. But this is just a lemon. At the produce store. For your mom.
Him: I'll get in trouble.
Me: How? By whom?
Him: The crossing guard.
Me: What will he do?
Him: Tell the principal.
Me: Really? The crossing guard knows your name?
Him: No.
Me: Then how will he tell the principal?
Him: He'll look through the yearbook until he finds me.
Me: The crossing guard will sit in the office and look at pictures of 500 kids because you went to the store to get a lemon.
Him: Yes.

                   *                     *                     *                     *                     *

Me: Here's a hard question. There's no right answer. It's supposed to make you think about power and responsibility:
Chris and Alex (insert any gender-neutral names here) live in a castle which is surrounded by a moat. There is one bridge, which is guarded. One day Chris leaves the castle, telling Alex that if Alex leaves the castle, Chris has instructed the guard to kill Alex. After Chris has left, Alex decides to go visit a lover outside the castle. In the evening, Alex needs to return to the castle, but the guard is waiting at the bridge. Alex goes to a boat captain and tells the captain the problem, begging for a ride across the moat. The captain asks for money, which Alex does not have. Alex goes to a friend, asking for money to pay the boat captain. The friend says they don't want to get involved and refuses to give Alex money. Alex returns to the lover looking for help, but the lover refuses to be involved beyond an afternoon tryst. Finally, desperate, Alex tries to cross the bridge to enter the castle before Chris returns. The guard kills Alex.
Here is the question - Who is most at fault for Alex's death? Chris, Alex, the guard, the lover, the captain, or the friend?

Him: (Look of relief on his face) I thought you said it was hard. It's Alex. Because Alex broke the rule.

                   *                     *                     *                     *                     *

Me: (Pointing to the left corner of the table) Over here are people who always follow the rules. They never cross against the light. They always drive the speed limit.

(Pointing to right corner of table) Over here are people who don't follow the rules. They want something, they steal it. They don't like someone, they punch them in the face.

Where do you think most people are on this line?

Him: (Points to a spot near left corner)

Me: Where do you think you are?

Him: (Points almost to left corner)

Me: Where do you think Martin Luther King Jr. was?

Him: (Points to air to the left of left corner)

Me: Nope. Martin Luther King Jr. didn't like the rules. He broke them so he could change them. He went to jail. He was here (Pointing to spot partway down on table).

Him: (Mind blown)